When one starts doing personal development courses to help others, one quickly realises that so many people are in fact not self-aware, and they don’t really care about it. It never occurs to them that they are largely ignorant about inter-personal dynamics, and they tend to behave as if they know it all already. When I was asked to do some team development at a Cambridge University institute the brief was that the technicians were causing problems and they needed to learn to work better together. It quickly became obvious that it was the academics who were causing all the problems by their unrealistic demands and the power imbalance. When I suggested that it was the academics who needed training it went down like a lead balloon. So, I had to adjust the course for the technicians into how to deal with difficult people with unrealistic expectations and a sense of entitled divinity. The preferred reality there, held by the academics, was that THEY, the technicians, were the problem.
Lots of people have preferred versions where everybody else is the problem. There is always someone else putting flies in my ointment, pissing on my fire, it is all their fault, the bastards.
People can be very insular and myopic.
I mentioned elsewhere in the blog there is the phenomenon of unacceptable truths. Something may be true accurate and correct, but the mind, the perception, is totally unwilling to accept it, because accepting it brings with it implications and consequences which differ from the held preferred notion or version of reality. To accept said truth causes the “reality version” to implode, crash and burn.
I know someone who found out in middle age that the person he thought was his biological father was probably not. He did not want to do a DNA test to have surety. People can tell whopping lies to each other for decades. The truth is not acceptable.
I doubt most are able to be ruthlessly and accurately honest with themselves. I added accurately because people can be overly harsh and critical. Honesty is balanced and not skewed either one way or the other.
If you think about it, even a little bit, the scope of the title question is vast. It encompasses approach to life, to death and notions of afterlife. Most people tend to be centred in the socio-political programmed common view of the world. If you read newspapers or listen to the news, that demarcates the boundaries of the everyday “reality”.
If you meditate on the question, “do you have a preferred version of reality?” You will begin to see how many biases, preconceptions and assertions you have. There will be elements of your “reality” that you take for granted which are unbalanced and inaccurate.
What is your preferred version of reality?
Is it real?