Benevolent Meddling?

Overnight I have been reflecting on how many people meddle in the lives of others. They might imagine that they are, for example, aiding the career or love life of the victim. Many imagine that they know what is best for others and inflict the profound supposed nature of their wisdom.

The problem is that this “benevolent” meddling can be based on lack of knowledge and a whole host of assumptions as to what the victim might like. It rarely occurs to the meddler that the victim may have entirely different needs than those imagined by the meddler. They may even discuss amongst themselves who might be good for a role and then fit that person up.

When one or more meddlers conspire they often present to the victim a “fait accompli” into which the victim feels coerced. On occasion the victim says, “foxtrot that for a game of soldiers” and the well prepared meddling attempt fails badly.

It is very rare for the meddler to seek the opinion of the victim until the meddling schemata is already well advanced. It does not occur to the meddler that this is a form of forceful manipulation and not benevolent direction.

Sometimes the meddlers can get themselves into situations which are beyond their ken and as a consequence dig for themselves a very deep hole from which there is no easy extraction.

Have you ever meddled in the life of another?

Did you imagine that you were doing it for their good / benefit?

Do you know best?

Did you ask them if they wanted you to meddle in their lives?

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